looking for love
In the mornings, I ride a bus to the metro station just across the river from Washington, DC. Most mornings, the trains heading downtown are mostly full but not uncomfortable. Today however, there was some sort of backup and the platform was very, very full waiting for the next yellow line train.
Once the train finally arrived, everyone pushed and shoved their way on-board. There have been a number of shouting incidents in my train cars this week. Both from the shoved and the shovees. So after the obligatory grumbling and you-pushed-me exclamations. I heard a guy making friends with the woman behind me. He complimented her sweater and then moved quickly as to whether or not she was married. I thought to myself, we’ve got us a crazy.
At the next stop, he ended up right next to me in the extremely packed car. He then launched into a speech about how couples end up meeting each other due to canceled flights, subway cars, etc. Most people were trying to ignore him, especially me, as everyone knows avoiding eye contact is a must if they really are nuts.
But then I funny thing happened. He started flirting with the woman right next to me, who was a lovely late 30s Australian lady who seemed a little flattered by his questions of whether or not she was married, did she like to play golf, eat sushi? It was actually kind of sweet. Everyone around started giggling at his gentle and inept attempts.
Next he moved onto me. Fortunately, I am married but that didn’t exempt me from the questions. But by the time, the train arrived at the stop, I was smiling. He no longer seemed crazy just an older guy who genuinely was looking for love on his way to work.
For some reason, this little encounter brightened my day. It was a really pleasant change from all the snide comments and insults.
I thought I would share. Did anything unusual brighten your morning?
Adjusting to huge changes
When I started this blog, my husband and I were just a few short months from moving to London after living in Washington, DC for 4+ years. While I knew the move was going to wreak huge changes in our lives and be very expensive, I was still looking forward to it. London is an amazing city and I was also planning to make a professional move that I’ve wanted to do for some time. A sort of fresh start. It was going to be hard, but worth it in the end.
After the holidays, my husband told me of the reservations he’d been having about the move. Bear in mind that our first child is due to arrive in 6 weeks, so we have a A LOT going on right now. Given that we both have stable jobs in DC and a network of friends, he feels it would be irresponsible to move a few months after the birth of our son without definite jobs, place to live, etc. I completely agree that the plan to move so soon after having a baby was never going to be easy and possibly a tad irresponsible, but I was ready and willing to do it. After all, we saved up plenty of funds for the move and months of living expenses, planned for over a year, and begun to wade through all the paperwork.
So we’re staying. It makes sense. But I’m having a hard time adjusting. I’m a planner. It’s hard for me to recalibrate when we’ve already gone so far down the path. In a lot of ways, I’m relieved. The move, a new baby, new jobs, new city was going to be tough. It’s much easier to stay. But I’m also disappointed. Granted, it was far more exciting for me. I didn’t grow up in London, so it still has an exotic appeal to me.
The weirdest thing, though, is that I don’t feel comfortable making the same big changes in my life now that we’re staying. I have a very secure and well-paying job in DC. I’ve been wanting to change careers for several years, but could never bring myself to take the necessary huge pay cut. By moving to London, I was starting fresh anyway, and thought is was the perfect time to enter this new field. I know this is ridiculous, but I just can’t bring myself to cut the ties yet. Plus everyone keeps telling me that starting a brand new job as a first-time mother is a recipe for disaster. I still can’t help thinking that I’m letting fear hold me back.
And lastly, I started this blog thinking I would be juggling savings, investments and taxes on both sides of the pond. It’s now going to be several years at least before that happens. Do I keep writing on the topic? It seems to be of interest to a lot of people or do I refocus given my changed circumstance?